10 regulations to help online dating rules obtain the right partner
Never show too much interest, especially not announce any interest in a relationship
Prof. Franz J. Neyer: This rule is no good. Anyone who wants something should show interest – what kind of relationship am I looking for? – and positively assesses your own chances of achieving your goal. The subjectively assessed value on the partner market should also be considered – are there attractive alternatives for me?
Patrick Salmen: If you are generally not interested in other people, you should probably question the meaning of a date. Seriously! If you just want to have a nice night, then you should play with open cards: “Sorry, I would like to sleep with you, make you coffee tomorrow morning and then go back home.” Nevertheless, one would be very well advised on a first date It is imperative to avoid sentences like these: “I want to marry you. Day after tomorrow!”
Barbara Ruscher: That’s funny. What do you say to disguise: “I don’t have time for a relationship at the moment. I’m only here to collect signatures against littering the seas with plastic bags – are you participating? “
14. Compliments are taboo – far too humiliating!
Eric Hegmann: No. Compliments are allowed because they signal attention. The other person has probably thought very carefully about showing up on the date just like that. This effort can be rewarded.
Patrick Salmen: Why? It’s all a matter of tone. Sexism and haggling – “Hey Olle, great breasts!” – is one thing, but an honest compliment is another: “You have beautiful earlobes!”
15. Don’t tell too much about yourself, rather listen – always remain mysterious
Pamela Moucha: It’s a question of good style, but not one that is specific to a date. Those who are by nature egomaniac will not last long in a fake attitude. Of course, it doesn’t hurt to be interested in the other person and to ask attentive questions. Sure: You shouldn’t give up all intimacies straight away in order to leave something to discover. Exaggerated secrecy can also be interpreted as vanity.
Barbara Ruscher: Since men cannot listen, this part falls to women anyway. Although men do
also don’t like to talk. They also prefer to write things like “I’m chilling out” in the networks. “There’s no beer.” “It’s about to grill up.” And post photos of the bloody neck of beef steak. The vegans too. From the zucchini-celery patty. To remain silent and still have a conversation: Simply exchange the most important information at the table by email.
15. Men flirt differently than women, I should know the rules in order to read and send out the signals
Prof. Franz J. Neyer: When flirting, you should rely on your gut instinct and not believe in stereotypical gender roles. Whether the chemistry is right or not depends on many factors, including chance – and certainly not on any rules.
Barbara Ruscher: It is said that women can control the courtship behavior of men by pretending to be obscure. This creates confusion and is interesting. But be careful: it can also backfire. If, for example, one suddenly comes up with Angela Merkel and Vladimir Putin in between explaining his idea of a relationship, it could be the wrong track. It might work with Sarkozy though.
16. Men are drawn to traits that suggest fertility – young and sexy, for example
Prof. Franz J. Neyer: Many studies prove this, at least with regard to partner preferences in young adulthood. Nobody knows how this will change in the course of life. By the way, young and sexy by no means imply old and unsexy.
Patrick Salmen: In general, I am drawn to traits that suggest emotional intelligence and humor. If she still looks interesting and wants five children, she’d be happy to!
17. Women value characteristics that suggest assertiveness, self-confidence and status
Prof. Franz J. Neyer: That too has been scientifically proven. But seriously: women are not prohibited from paying attention to the physical attractiveness of men. Much more important is the question of what a woman is looking for: the partner for starting a family, eternal love, security, a phase of life or a relationship at a distance.
Barbara Ruscher: And empathy! The rest without the three characteristics mentioned is often sorted out, we learned that from the Chancellor: Merz: gone. Röttgen: gone. Öttinger: gone. Guttenberg: gone. Wulff: gone.
18. Don’t touch!
Richard Lemke: That can build up tension for a certain time and in a pleasant way. The question is how long the date is – and how long you can keep it up.